The Economist's Cookbook

Ah now what is this weapon you ask?
Was it a gun? No.
A knife? No.
A club? No.
A Molotov Cocktail? No.
A sword? No.
A chainsaw? Cool, but no.
An ice pick? *sigh* No.
A rabid ferret? Okay, now we're getting desperate.
A trained attack Tyrannosaurus? Ummm ... NO.

It was in fact a ... drumroll please ...





A broken pencil sharpener.

Wait ... WHAT?!

A teacher at Hilton Head Island International Baccalaureate Elementary School noticed the boy had what appeared to be a small razor blade during class on Tuesday, according to a Beaufort County sheriff's report.

It was obvious that the blade was the metal insert commonly found in a child's small, plastic pencil sharpener, the deputy noted.

Ummmm ... yeah, because this is productive use of the cop's time.

District spokesman Randy Wall said ... "We're always going to do something to make sure the child understands the seriousness of having something that could potentially harm another student, but we're going to be reasonable..."

They will make an example of you to better create passive sheep in their midst. The individual is not important ... all that is important is that the masses get their dose of indoctrination.

Christ, I hate public schools.